Seeing as the inaugural Food For Thought Friday used my own question I thought it only fitting that I write my own thoughts on it!
So… Would I stay in a sexual relationship if oral sex was totally off the table?
Well, when I posed the question, I was careful to include the word sexual to describe or define the relationship – I was thinking along the lines of a FWB/FB/hook up arrangement, not a long term connection that involved all the other aspects of being in a relationship.
If I was with a person purely for sexual reasons, I think I would be very disappointed if oral sex didn’t feature in our shenanigans. It is an incredibly sexy activity, whatever end of it you are at, giving or receiving. If a person didn’t want to go down on me I think I would be a bit hurt! What’s wrong with me? Why not? It’s perfectly groomed and cared for, it’s clean, it’s pretty… why not? If my FB refused to allow me to perform oral sex I would be frustrated and confused… Again? Why not? You haven’t even given me a chance to prove how good I am at it! At least give me a fair go before you dismiss the idea!
Ok, I am being a tad facetious, but seriously, if my aim is to give and receive sexual pleasure with another person then I would definitely include oral sex in my menu.
However, if I was in love with the person, if we had a life together and shared more than just our bodies with each other, then I feel differently. First of all, I would expect we would be able to have a frank conversation about the issue and how we each feel about it. Secondly, if everything else in the relationship was satisfactory, then oral sex really isn’t the make or break of it… there are plenty of other ways to enjoy sex if someone is set against oral.
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